Cat things.

Spider is going to simultaneously drive us insane and starve to death. It used to be that every morning food must be put into the bowls or she won't eat. This is regardless of how full of food the bowls already are. As of today she wants fresh food put into the bowls every and any time she's ready to eat. Grr. Ergh. I am not a personal waiter for the cat.

I remember, a couple nights ago before bed, a conversation about cat beating as a recreational sport. It was decided that professional cat beating would be no fun because there'd be too much emphasis on proper form in styles such as the open-handed side thump and the over-nose noogie. There'd have to be a whole separate division for spin-the-cat, of course.

Why yes, these are all maneuvers I practice regularly on my cat, and she loves me for them.